Monday, August 29, 2011

Conversations with Crows

While playing with my 1.5 year old son yesterday, I caught him smiling at the crow sitting on our windowsill and chatting with it. Endearing as that scene was, it brought home to me the realisation that I was far far away from such earthly pleasures. Caught up as I am in this crazy running around that I have learnt to call Life, I have drifted far away from golden, magical moments that carry so much joy and bliss. Isn’t this the case with many of you?

Seriously, when was the last time you spent hours counting the stars and wondering what it was like up there ....... walked barefoot on the grass without worrying about the next deadline at work ..... sipped your chai with complete abandon and luxury, without timing yourself to the schedule of the train you need to catch? Why go that far, how many of you woke up today morning cursing the rain, thinking of all that you had to do at the office, and how inconvenient it would be to get to work with this 3-day non-stop rain? Oh no, these are things meant for children, you’ll think, or for people who have nothing to do. Not for busy, important people like you, who have so much to achieve in life. If you spend time star gazing or chai sipping, you will miss the bus to success, riches, fame, or whatever it is that you need to achieve.

I am like that too. I run my life on a tight schedule, and pride myself on a time table that accounts for every possibility in the week. My life is dictated by my to-do list, and nothing gives me a better high than checking off an item from that list. My comprehensive list includes not just my work appointments and tasks, but also items like making calls to friends, taking my children’s studies, catching up on reading! Oh yes, everything has to be planned, every minute accounted for to the last nano-second! Until yesterday, I felt proud of the way I ran my life on clockwork, planning for everything, accounting for every possibility. After all, if one has to achieve a lot in life, one needs to plan, right? But yesterday’s simple visual of watching my baby engrossed in his conversation with the crow brought with it tremendous insight for me. I realised what I was missing out in Life. I was missing out on the spontaneity of living, on experiencing moments that are not only joyous and blissful, but also bring with them their own wisdom and learning.

So yesterday, I made a promise to myself. A promise to be alive to the surprise and joy that every moment in Life has to offer, to be open to unexpected situations that are beyond my planner, and accept them gracefully, allowing myself to learn the lessons that it has to teach me. A promise to stare dreamily at the rain that I so loved as a child, to be spontaneous, and yes, to talk to the crows!